Wavering

Meditation
I Samuel 27:1,2—David said to himself, "One of these days I'll be swept away by Saul. There is nothing better for me than to escape immediately to the land of the Philistines. Then Saul will stop searching for me everywhere in Israel, and I'll escape from him." So David set out with his 600 men and went to Achish son of Maoch, the king of Gath.


What happened? Why did David, the Middle Eastern heartthrob and most popular combatant on the known planet decide it was time to flee the country? He had just filled King Saul with shame by sparing him when by all rights he could have speared him. Saul even admitted knowing David would prevail. David knew that God promised him the kingship. God never reigns through dead bodies. So why did he give in to the notion that Saul could end his life?


Maybe he was tired. Fatigue can make us second guess anything.


Maybe he was afraid. Instead of trusting God as was his normal pattern, perhaps he looked at circumstances and let them dictate his next course of action.


Maybe he was discouraged. Often after a major victory or emotional high, we are subject to a letdown. Remember Elijah after defeating 400 of Baal’s prophets and making King Ahab look ridiculous, fled in abject fear when Queen Jezebel vowed to kill him? David knew he was God’s anointed, but that did not mean that every day he woke up feeling positive about his life expectancy. Even oil dries up.


Maybe he was stuck—his options seemed dismal. If he went back home to Judah and Saul came after him again, he put his entire family in jeopardy. He knew Saul was spiritually unstable yet held the power so today’s peace was no guarantee of security tomorrow. What else could he do but run and seek the protection of Gath’s king?


I remember in 1991 before the Gulf War broke out, a Captain in my unit was terrified that we might deploy. Faced with a scary unknown, he wavered. Instead of fulfilling his obligation, he found a way to get medically separated from the Army. Later, when the war quickly ended, he managed to come back into the reserves. Ironically, our unit never did deploy. I watched how my friend faltered and it made a deep impression on me. But the truth is we all waver. Who never has moments of doubt or hesitation? Often those who seem the most in control are inwardly insecure and prone to all kinds of mental vacillation.


Right now, you may be facing a big decision. You may be tired, afraid, or at wits end. At this moment of choice look to the Lord for wisdom and strength. Ask for His help. Share with Him what you are feeling. He understands. He will guide and protect you. You don’t have to waver! Listen for His direction and act decisively. We know the Father of what to do so why live like we don’t!


Inspiration
Pray the Lord ever to give me the single eye, the clear judgment, the wisdom and gentleness, the patient spirit, the unwavering purpose, the unshaken faith, the Christ like love needed for the efficient discharge of my duties. And ask Him to send us sufficient means and suitable helpers for the great work which we have as yet barely commenced.—Hudson Taylor